Dreams End

The morning light filtered through the windows into the silent room. The cheerful illumination starke contrast to the shadows in her eyes. Taking a deep breath, a vain attempt to block out the screaming of protest to her heart she knelt, dropping slowly to her knees as she had so many times before, so many happy times. Her bottom rested snuggly between her heals, her toes pointed parallel to the floor, her shoulders pulled back caused a graceful arch to her back. Reverent. Respectful. Silent. Sorrowful. Hesitantly her hand traced the delicate metal around her neck as to commit the intricate pattern to memory; a needless action for the cool metal had long since burned its place into her soul. A burn much stronger than the sting behind her eyelids.

Letting her chin drop and her long curls fall to the side over her shoulder she reached behind her to unlock the clasp. The opening "click" so silent she was sure it was only her imagination that made the sound seem like the slamming of steel door. Or perhaps the slamming was the sound of her heartbeat, the irratic pulse as it rushed in her ears. She opened her eyes to try to ease the fire and focus on the floor, a small patch of carpet just before his feet.

He shifted His weight impatiently.

It was time.

Her hands began to tremble noticably as she removed the collar from her neck. Leaning forward she placed the beautiful symbolism of her love and ownership on the very spot of carpet at which she had been staring.

One tear fell, absorbed by the fabric of the plush carpet. Gone. Disappeared as if it had never existed. Just like the dissolution of her dreams. Her heart stopped. There was no pounding, no rhythm, no whooshing. There was complete silence and she had to consciously remind herself to the breathe. The pain was ripping and jagged, it tore through her chest into her very soul and she couldn't control the tears any longer. With one quick gesture she removed the ring from her left ring finger nearly dropping it from the tremor of her hands. She didn't even look at it. She didn't need to. She knew the pattern, the cut and design of the metal shaped into tiny leaves supporting a diamond flower. She'd never forget. As she set the ring in the exact center of the empty collar her shoulders began to shake and she bit down hard on her bottom lip to silence any sound that would give her away.

She never looked up at Him. She never looked at His eyes. She knew seeing the the cold empitness there now where there once was warmth and love would be more than she could bear. Keeping her chin down and eyes closed in a poor attempt to hide her tears she rose to her feet with more strength than she actually felt.

He never said a word. He never moved. He never acknowledged her actions or seemed to notice her pain.

It was time.

It was over.

Turning, she walked away from her life, her dreams, her hope. Constricted and unyeilding her throat allowed her only one word, a choked whisper, "Goodbye."

(c) 11/23/2009 sierra sugar

Still Waters

They say still waters run deep.
The surface smooth. The surface calm.
But what you don't see below is the force of those waters, swift and strong. At times a veritable maelstrom of movement below surface warmth. Pushing and pulling from within, and surrounding anyone who manages to find their way inside.

They say still waters run deep.
And there is much more than what is seen reflected back to you. But for most the surface is all they will ever see. It may not always be a peaceful place. But it is my place.

They say still waters run deep. And if you're not afraid to look, you may just find me there.

(c) 2010 sierra sugar

Sounds of Silence

If you listen to the sounds of her silence you'll hear the crash of tears as they fall. And if you look through the brightness of her smile, you'll see the shadows of sorrow in her heart.

(c) 2011 Sierra Sugar

Ribbons of dreams

A shimmering silver ribbon coated in diamond dust sparkles brilliantly in the night. One end swaying lazyily, almost rhythmic in nature as if pulled by some unseen tide. "Follow me" it whispers melodically. And i do. i follow as it gently twists and turns carrying me through the darkness on a journey of incredibly beautiful dreams of hope and happiness.

~ (c) sierra sugar 5/15/2012

Beautiful Day

The southern sun is already high in the morning sky, Pushing back the shadows helping to light the way. It's spreading warmth helps the busy workers reluctantly shrug off sleep. With a stretch and yawn, and a tickle from the radiant rays, it's easy to see the start of another beautiful day.

(c) 7/25/2012 sierra sugar

Dreams of a kiss

The strength of your arms around me. Your whiskers tickle my cheek even as your breath teases my ear. The curve of your lips, tempting, so promising, so near. And a moment's pause. A moment to think, a moment to wish. But it's a moment too long and now the moment is gone. And lost to the night air goes the dream of a kiss. 

(half asleep ramblings of a kitty mind).

 ~ (c) 8/1012012 sierra sugar

Turn Around

a little better than yesterday
but not quite as good as tomorrow
hoping to just find my way
to the other side of sorrow

smiles and laughter are waiting
i know i'll have my share
happiness for the taking
when i finally make it there

so goodbye to all the reasons
that have turned life upside down
time welcome a new season
time to turn my heart around

~ (c) sierra sugar 8/14/2012

Kitten and Master more excerpts from 2001

".....he was the lone wolf, a mere shadow against the dark night. He met her single cry with a solitary, soulful howl. Heard it echo off the trees and spread through the night saturating everything it touched with his torment. When the world settled and silence resumed, he lowered his head and went to face the world. " c2012 - Sierra Sugar

 

Kitten and Master an excerpt (from 2001)

"....The wind from the approaching storm whipped her hair about, the ends lashing quickly at her face before she could capture the wild tendrils with her hands and tie it back. The knight’s sword dropped, tip first into the damp sand and he leaned on it for support. Clearly relieved, his gaze followed the line of his sword into the sand.

“Thank the gods its only you.” He muttered." c2012 - Sierra Sugar

*actually this is part of a story that I started back in 2001 that I've been editing and adding to.  It's just a collection of excerpts and chapters that I hope to finish into a full story one day.

Dark Skies

Dark skies for now
Winds blow and water washes over me
Dark skies don't fear
Storms wash away sorrow to bring a new day 

(c) 2012 - Sierra

Just hold on

The winds of change are blowing
The cool breeze of positive things
The silver lining means sunshine is on the way
Soon tomorrow will be a better day
Just hold on
Just hold on
Tomorrow will be a better day.

~ (c) sierra sugar 11/2/2012

Today

Today i wiped the last tear from cheek. i will not cry over the past and pain anymore. What ever pain, emotion, feelings, hurt, and anger remains will be bottled up and tucked away. i refuse to spend the next 6 months of my life struggling to heal like i did the last time. i refuse to wait, and watch, and hope, and suffer. The past is gone and i will move on.

Today i choose to patch my heart by sheer force of will, hold my head up, and face life full of hope for the future. i will be loved, even if it is only to be loved by myself.

~ (c) sierra sugar 10/28/2012

Tomorrow

There are days when i stumble.
Times when i fall.
When i just want to crawl into the darkness
and escape from it all.
But i bottle the tears.
i hold my head high.
And remember that tomorrow is just
as far as the next sunrise.

 ~ (c) sierra sugar 10/15/2012

The Moon

Moonlight dripping through the inky darkness, a translucent watercolor of light against the black canvas night. It's opalescent glow drowns all but the strongest stars as their light flickers and fades only to break through again, as if their burning mass was struggling to tread water inside a vast ocean of pitch. The moon their only beacon even as it's light drowns their own radiance.

The crisp night air steals breath as the wind wisps it away, adding to it's collection of whispered wishes and unspoken dreams. Perhaps they'll reach the ears of hope hidden somewhere beyond the veil of the unknown.

The light, the dark, the wind, the chill, the hopes, the dreams, the ever being, from birth to death, from first to last breath, and everywhere in between, the moon.... she see's it all and reflects it back to those who take the time to stop and truly see.

(c) Sierra Sugar 
     03/01/2013